january 1st journal

Hello to the year two thousand twenty-one of the Common Era. To the possibility of safe vaccinations. To the potential of what we can do when we all march, protest, demand, hope together. To using everything I’ve learned about self-care and continuing to improve my practice of loving myself. To being a year older and hopefully a year wiser. To new ways of doing old things.

I can’t help but feel a little foolish for taking up blogging again on the first of the year. I am hopeful that this can be part of my practice, of crawling out of my shell carefully, of more mindfully engaging in the world in ways that are necessary and not for show.

I’d like to take more photos, but right now there’s not a lot of daylight and I’m usually busy taking care of myself and my household responsibilities (like managing the kids’ virtual school) during the bit of daylight we have. Also, it’s Michigan, so it’s too cold for hanging about with the curtains open all the time. AND WE AREN’T PAYING TO HEAT THE OUTDOORS.

Perhaps this time around the sun I can be kinder to myself, not so frustrated when reality doesn’t match my expectations. I’ll be going to regular teletherapy, continuing to knit the first blanket I’m making for myself, browsing small person clothing on the Target website (it’s so much fun to dress a tiny person!!), staying under my bedcovers when I want to, managing the household projects I’ve taken on, and — this is important — increase my belief that naps are a good idea.

Nix Kelley
Co-parent to multiple kids. Writer. Death doula. Member of the Order of the Good Death. Seeker on the Path of Light. Queer, non-binary, & trans.


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