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the Infinite

queer identity, death, hope, praxis, song lyrics, and sometimes hubris
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strands of yellow bright light swirled together across a black background
on Chosen Family/on Deathwork & Griefwork/on Grief/on Love

dissolving into Light: even the least of these

I think I'm learning that even experiencing a Mystery does not mean it can be fully comprehended. The only thing we have is what we noticed, what was revealed, ...

photoshoot of eight members of Stray Kids, all wearing black
on Happiness/on Hope/on Queerness/Ten Things

ten things: an earthquake and the joy of fandoms

Maybe that's the best outcome of going places I've never been before. Discovering how easy it is to love the beautifulness and culture and sound of a place I've...

a book is standing up and actively on fire
on Chosen Family/on Decolonizing/on Generational Trauma/on Grief/on Harm & Reciprocity/on Rage

write me out of the family bible

I have no family but the one I choose. And I will choose them over and over and over again because I know what it's like to choose the wrong thing and suffer be...

stumpy-tailed lizard. dark on top with some pale coloring on the belly and legs. texture like a pine cone.
on Chosen Family/on Perimenopause/Ten Things

ten things: wha’ the hail

I'm not sorry ahead of time for how unhinged this is.

on Deathwork & Griefwork/on Grief/on Mental Health/Poems

falling out of the light {poem}

cw: poetic imagery of drowning, ideation, hopelessness

large letters made of lights that spell "HOPE" against a backdrop of trees and hanging lights at night
on Chosen Family/on Decolonizing/on Generational Trauma/on Harm & Reciprocity/on Hope/on Love/on Praxis/the Work

chosen family: all you have is what you are

Each of us has to go on this journey of undoing the damage of our belief system in order to learn a new one, separately, although we can be in community while w...

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hi, I'm Nix

The sidebar got too big so I moved all my words about me to a page: who is Nix?

CURRENTLY READING:

I am on StoryGraph tracking my reading and the reading challenges I've joined. You can go to my StoryGraph profile if you want to see what kind of reading I'm doing right now.

CURRENTLY WATCHING:

I am using MyDramaList now! Here's my MDL profile and my MDL watchlists. I recommend looking at my 2025 watchlist to see what I've watched already and what's on my massive personal wishlist for the year.

... when Skywoman arrived here, she did not come alone. She was pregnant. Knowing her grandchildren would inherit the world she left behind, she did not work for flourishing in her time only. It was through her actions of reciprocity, the give and take with the land, that the original immigrant became indigenous. For all of us, becoming indigenous to a place means living as if your children's future mattered, to take care of the land as if our lives, both material and spiritual, depended on it.

-- excerpt from Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer

remember who you are

It is our suffering that brings us together. It is not love. Love does not obey the mind, and turns to hate when forced. The bond that binds us is beyond choice. We are brothers. We are brothers in what we share. In pain, which each of us must suffer alone, in hunger, in poverty, in hope, we know our brotherhood. We know it, because we have had to learn it. We know that there is no help for us but from one another, that no hand will save us if we do not reach out our hand. And the hand that you reach out is empty, as mine is. You have nothing. You possess nothing. You own nothing. You are free. All you have is what you are, and what you give.

-- excerpt from The Dispossessed: an Ambiguous Utopia by Ursula K. LeGuin

© 2025 the Infinite + Phoenix Veritas Kelley
who is Nix?