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the Infinite
queer identity, death, hope, praxis, song lyrics, and sometimes hubris
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Category: the Cycle of the Seasons

POV on a rollercoaster, blurred to indicate speed and motion
on Hope/on Praxis/the Cycle of the Seasons/the Work

the sixth day

I am doing the math of harm every day, sometimes minute by minute, so that we can keep this ship on the water.

an extremely relaxed napping hippopotamus
on Hope/on Praxis/the Cycle of the Seasons/the Work

the fifth day

I just need to remind myself to go to bed early tonight because that would be a really nice thing to do for me. And I deserve thoughtfulness like that.

snow-covered trees against a pale blue-pink winter sunset
on Hope/on Praxis/the Cycle of the Seasons/the Work

the fourth day

Hopefully we can forgive our brains and our bodies for reacting to stress like they do. Hopefully we can take some deep breaths and shake the darkness off.

a person underneath white blankets with white pillows, with only light brown hair showing beneath the covers
on Hope/on Praxis/the Cycle of the Seasons/the Work

the third day

Hope and the willingness to let the day roll over you is a discipline, which means that sometimes it is VERY HARD and you have to practice interrupting your own...

a hand reaching upward, lit from the right on an open palm, against a dark background
on Hope/on Praxis/the Cycle of the Seasons/the Work

the second day

Darkness is no friend to the light. And the more we build our fire, the bigger and brighter it is.

silhouette of trees along riverbank under a starry night sky
on Hope/on Praxis/the Cycle of the Seasons/the Work

the first day

Today’s failures were the small mistakes, the ones we say or act without forethought. Today’s anxiety kept us from perfection, but it always does that.

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hi, I'm Nix

The sidebar got too big so I moved all my words about me to a page: who is Nix?

want to follow me around?

I have a secure group chat on Signal! I use it to send messages sometimes, a few photos, song links, audio recordings, short videos, links to essays or posts I write here, and other foolishness. You'll be able to emoji react to what I post (like an Instagram broadcast channel), and if you want to respond to something you can message me separately if we're following each other there.

Here's the link to the group chat so you can request to join: a Traveling Dragon group chat on Signal


CURRENTLY LISTENING TO ON REPEAT:


CURRENTLY READING:

I am on StoryGraph tracking my reading and the reading challenges I've joined. You can go to my StoryGraph profile if you want to see what kind of reading I'm doing right now.

CURRENTLY WATCHING:

I am using MyDramaList now! Here's my MDL profile and my MDL watchlists. I recommend looking at my 2025 watchlist to see what I've watched already and what's on my massive personal wishlist for the year.

... when Skywoman arrived here, she did not come alone. She was pregnant. Knowing her grandchildren would inherit the world she left behind, she did not work for flourishing in her time only. It was through her actions of reciprocity, the give and take with the land, that the original immigrant became indigenous. For all of us, becoming indigenous to a place means living as if your children's future mattered, to take care of the land as if our lives, both material and spiritual, depended on it.

-- excerpt from Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer

remember who you are

It is our suffering that brings us together. It is not love. Love does not obey the mind, and turns to hate when forced. The bond that binds us is beyond choice. We are brothers. We are brothers in what we share. In pain, which each of us must suffer alone, in hunger, in poverty, in hope, we know our brotherhood. We know it, because we have had to learn it. We know that there is no help for us but from one another, that no hand will save us if we do not reach out our hand. And the hand that you reach out is empty, as mine is. You have nothing. You possess nothing. You own nothing. You are free. All you have is what you are, and what you give.

-- excerpt from The Dispossessed: an Ambiguous Utopia by Ursula K. LeGuin

© 2025 the Infinite + Phoenix Veritas Kelley
who is Nix?