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the Infinite
queer identity, death, hope, praxis, song lyrics, and sometimes hubris
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Author: Nix Kelley

Co-parent to multiple kids. Writer. Death doula. Member of the Order of the Good Death. Seeker on the Path of Light. Queer, non-binary, & trans.
closeup of a dark brown tree trunk with some green leaves growing on thin vines. from the Aomori area in Japan.
on Books I've Read/on Grief

the premonition, by banana yoshimoto

Reading this book was like pausing and allowing the story to come to me as it was. Reading this book was like a tea ceremony, measured and careful and holy and ...

large lettering on a concrete wall: WALLS ARE MEANT FOR CLIMBING. LAND BACK TURTLE ISLAND PALESTINE. WALL OF SHAME. from the river to the sea Palestine will be free.
on Decolonizing/on Happiness/on Harm & Reciprocity/on Neurodivergence

in my queer media era

Living in community with others, with love as a guiding principle, is helping me remember to assume the best about my family members.

a brown-skinned hand holding a watermelon slice against a backdrop of water
on Deathwork & Griefwork/on Decolonizing/on Grief/on Harm & Reciprocity/on Praxis/on Rage/Poems/the Work

we are Atlas

a better world is possible it will take all of us to make it where 'all of us' means those who will do the work

a nebula in shades of red and black surrounding a white star
on Chosen Family/on Grief/on Queerness

the defiance and pain of queer being

We are so beautiful. Even as we dance and glitter and breathe an air maybe only temporarily free, we are beautiful. So long as we exist, we will always be light...

grey, black, and red lit clouds over a reflective lake surface
on Deathwork & Griefwork/on Neurodivergence/on Praxis/the Work

on being fundamentally changed

I used to think that I was weak, and tried to make that untrue by becoming as strong as possible. I used to believe that I was nobody, and tried to make that un...

an image of the sun showing a coronal hole facing the earth
on Deathwork & Griefwork/on Harm & Reciprocity/on Rage/Poems

a hole in the sun

there is a hole in the sun and it is shaped like Gaza

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hi, I'm Nix

The sidebar got too big so I moved all my words about me to a page: who is Nix?



CURRENTLY READING:

I am on StoryGraph tracking my reading and the reading challenges I've joined. You can go to my StoryGraph profile if you want to see what kind of reading I'm doing right now.

CURRENTLY WATCHING:

I am using MyDramaList now! Here's my MDL profile and my MDL watchlists. I recommend looking at my 2025 watchlist to see what I've watched already and what's on my massive personal wishlist for the year.

It is our suffering that brings us together. It is not love. Love does not obey the mind, and turns to hate when forced. The bond that binds us is beyond choice. We are brothers. We are brothers in what we share. In pain, which each of us must suffer alone, in hunger, in poverty, in hope, we know our brotherhood. We know it, because we have had to learn it. We know that there is no help for us but from one another, that no hand will save us if we do not reach out our hand. And the hand that you reach out is empty, as mine is. You have nothing. You possess nothing. You own nothing. You are free. All you have is what you are, and what you give.

-- excerpt from The Dispossessed: an Ambiguous Utopia by Ursula K. LeGuin

© 2025 the Infinite + Phoenix Veritas Kelley
who is Nix?